A Girl’s Guide to Moving to a New City
By Brytin Staab
There is nothing quite like stepping out of the airport and immediately being greeted by the sights and scents of a new city. Daydreams of unfamiliar restaurants, stores, and experiences are reasons why everyone loves to travel — yet these same idyllic fantasies aren't nearly as present for someone making the deer-in-the-headlights jump into a new city. As they fumble with their phones and double check their keys, many metropolis newbies find that there’s nothing calming about re-creating your identity and life in a foreign place. Thankfully, we have the resources to make working, shopping, dating, and befriending easier during the big transition.
While we all may want to be Carrie Bradshaw with that picture-perfect (and affordable) apartment in a lovely neighborhood, our budgets and job usually provide us with a quick reality check.
Finding Your Safe Haven
The scariest part of going anywhere, whether moving or traveling, is finding your home base. Regardless of what you're looking for, whether home or hotel, start with maps. Seriously— it is so easy to search for popular stores or restaurants and make note of what neighborhood they're in. Narrow down your top choices, look up crime statistics, and try to snoop on Next Door to see if you can find out information about the types of people who live there (families, singles, etc.). You can also contact the local police department to ask for crime stats! Reach out to HR if you're moving for a job and they’ll be able to provide you with a list of zip codes based on your preferences. Don’t be scared to also seek out professional help—realtors at local real estate firms are fabulous resources for finding apartments. Usually, their services are free if you write their name down when applying for a lease!
Becoming a Local
Pre-COVID, many of our days centered around our own little working corner of the world. The office is the center of life for many of us, but it’s nice to take advantage of the best restaurants and bars after hours to let off steam or order takeout on those late nights spent working away. You may not know many people yet, but connecting with some of your new coworkers for tips on some of the best spots can easily transition into a new friendship and will leave you knowledgeable about what’s good in the city. Ask if they want to accompany you or bring a few people — you may just find your new crew. My favorite thing to do is keep a note on my phone with a running list of the places I've heard about and where I've been to help keep track of both classic locales and new places I want to try so I can get to know the city better.
We all have our holy grail spots when it comes to shopping malls, grocery stores, and even movie theaters. When I moved to a new city, one of the worst feelings was realizing my beloved Safeway from home was nowhere to be found. Each part of the country offers different grocery stores, so hop on maps or read up to learn the ones available in your city. For fashion, be sure to research the best areas to shop for both high-end and affordable attire. Make conversation by asking your co-workers for their recommendations, too. They’ve probably already scouted a gym, a coffee shop, and a salad bar that’s in proximity to the office.
Cutting Costs Where it Counts
There is nothing quite like taking a break from your normal routine to go shopping, grab a cup of coffee, or take an Uber to a new part of town. While we’re all balancing work and self care, money management and constraints make it even trickier. It’s easy to follow the influencers, pinterest boards, and social media posts that justify spending, but the costs accumulate quickly and can do more harm than good in the long run. Try making a spreadsheet and start with necessary expenses and savings, then break down your budget and plan for nights out, brunches with friends, a new shirt. Stow away a small stash of cash for those spontaneous trips to Target after a bad day. Take a train, bus, or another mode of transportation that is cost-effective. Most professionals do it, and it’s an easy way to save money.
Dating in a New Place
Dating is already hard enough in a world where everyone is glued to their phones. You can practically never decipher whether someone wants a serious relationship or hookup. So navigating dating in a new city, that has a distinct social culture from what you’re accustomed to, can be even more confusing. That’s why I stick to face to face interaction with someone that my coworker, friend, or family member knows. When moving to a new city, don't be afraid to talk to people in coffee shops, restaurants, or on your train to work. And definitely do not date your co-worker!
Finding Your People
Making friends is easily the most intimidating part of relocating to a new city. Especially in a place with millions of other individuals— how do you narrow the population down to find your people? College is typically one of the better environments for this sort of struggle — you'll be in classes, organizations, and invited to parties where you can meet those with whom you likely have something in common. But what about the working professionals of the world? My best advice— be everywhere. Spend time with coworkers and meet their friends, strike a conversation with someone in a coffee shop, ask that girl about the cute shirt she just grabbed at the mall. Being social and being present is an active choice. Making this new place your home depends on how willing you are to put yourself out there! Utilize your current friend group circle to try to make connections— everyone you meet knows somebody you probably already know. You'd be surprised at how accurate the "it's a small world" phrase is.
When it comes to moving to a new city, there’s endless things to talk about. Things like doctors, dentists, and hair stylists I didn't even think about until I was already settled into my apartment. Sometimes it will just take trial and error, but don't be afraid to ask "a friend of a friend" what they've heard or what works for them. And most importantly, be flexible and adaptable to the different situations in which you may find yourself. But also adhere to your core values and beliefs to guide you in this new season of life. Sometimes it takes a leap of faith in a new place to truly find yourself. For many of us, the start of a potential new friendship and completing another to-do item are enough to ease the shock of adulting in a brand new home.
Photo via Helene Sula on Pinterest
